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10. Drafting legisltion to make 2001 "Take Your Father To Work Year" 9. To familiarize himself with military protocol, watching "F-Troop" 8. Planning to return to Texas to guest-host executions 7. Getting Linda Chavez to round up some illegal aliens to do a few chores around the White House 6. He's been nailing interns because dammit -- that's what presidents do! 5. Convincing Secret Service to change his code name from "Dumbass" 4. Practicing getting sick on world leaders just like dad 3. Making sure inaugural festivities don't include a breathalyzer test 2. Like every other American, is on his hands and knees saying, "Please lord, don't let Bush screw up" 1. Rehearsing his two-word inaugural speech: "Yee-haw!" |