"Free laundry is my new favorite thing." - Natalie

"They should put something in the salt lick to keep the deer from having babies!" - Sarah

"Jenny just had a silent orgasm at the thought of a king-sized bed and a trampoline in her bedroom..." - Sarah

"So you want to be someone that 10th graders bitch about in 50 years?" - Jenny to Ryan

"So, Matt, you're saying that you would rather look at young naked boys than old naked men?" "Yes." - Jenny and Matt

"Are you going to attempt to reason with me now? Have at it, man." - Pete

"You geographically suck." - Pete imitating a story of the past

"Antigone didn't know her hand from her foot!" - Kevin

"Would you like to tell that to her to her face?" - Matt

"She's dead." - Kevin

"Yeah, her dad killed her." - Jenny

"Well then, I guess her dad didn't like what she had to say either!" - Matt

"Oh my god my boobs are going to fall off." - Matt after working out

"Well that's just boobtastic!" - Pete

"Sea cucumbers are so cool! They can spit out their internal organs!" - Pete

"Let's just say the sea cucumber is one lucky little fish." - Pete

"I never knew I had a monkey named Nibbles but I care about him deeply." - Matt in response to the ransom note found on his desk. Well, not on his desk, rather jabbed into his bulletin board with a knife

"What about nipples?" - Kevin

"We all know what comes out of Pete's ass!" "Yeah, his hand" - Matt

"Everything melts in my mouth." - Allison

"We're gonna have our own stairs! You know what that means! Slinkies!" - Pete

"I can't catch balls with my bare hands, that would hurt." - Natalie

"I didn't use to be this way..." - Allison

"She's hip to our game, Kev." - Matt

"What decade are you from!?!" - Jenny

"If you guys were drinking right now, you would be SO dead. There would be a hole in the window, 4 dead corpses on the ground 7 stories down, and I'd just be standing here, shaking my head and saying 'Man, I hate windows.'" - Pete while we were doing flips on the couch at 3:30am

"Are you giving yourself breasts again? Didn't we talk about this?" - Pete to Matt

"You're pretty inanimate, Kev...I'd have sex in front of you." - Allison

"Can we go to Costco this weekend? I want to look at Dick's." - Allison

"It was either stay and watch, or go curl up in the bathroom with my thermo book." - Kevin

"Matty isn't tall, he just has a big strike zone." - General Consensus (I forget who really said it)

"Kevin's strike zone is getting bigger just thinking about it!" - Allison

"Everyone looks like the Matrix when they're wearing that coat." - Matt

"Yeah, like Clark Kent and those damn glasses." - Jenny

"So now we're watching TV, through Matty's computer, on the TV...but minimized..."

"Another mystery solved by history!" - Kevin on our hippodrome epiphany

"Kyle said to call her chlamidia...that could be her middle name, but then she'd be 'Mudslide Chlamidia'..." - Jenny

"That's like cause and effect!" - Allison to Jenny about the previous quote

"No sporting event is complete without a stealth bomber fly over!" - Matt

"Matty, I'm so glad you quit your job as a football coach and came to live with us." - Pete

"I figure after the Orioles are 0-30 at the end of April, they'll consider my offer to be their manager." - Jenny

"One guy sleeps on your couch and all of a sudden your roomates are crazy about locking the door." - Matt

"We get a gas stove? That's so cool. I love flames." - Natalie

"Ever since we gave women the right to vote, it's all gone downhill from there." - Matt

"Watch for moose - it could save your life." - Sign at Bugaboo

"That movie gives me a warm fuzzy feeling in my tummy." - Jenny

"So would eating a teddy bear." - Matty

"Going to bed early is almost as good as having sex in your dreams." - Natalie

"Why, I masticate several times a day!" - Matt

"I don't get what is so funny about mastication." "It's a funny word, you know, like when 3rd graders learn the meaning for epidermis and walk around saying 'your epidermis is showing' and everyone's all concerned." "But that isn't funny." "It isn't supposed to be funny to us, it's funny to 3rd graders!" <Kevin's laughter comes from around the corner> "And Kevin, apparently...." - Jenny teaching Natalie about young kid humor

"Lets go sleep together!" - Natalie

"We haven't had a good marker fight in a long time." - Matt, to which Jenny replied with a sharpie to his face

"AH! There's a dead thing there!" "No, that's just a sweatshirt laying on the ground." - Natalie and Jenny

"Ham is all ass." - Natalie

"That way our asses are covered. I am all about having my ass covered. Unlike my thong wearing roommate!" - Jenny

"You know what they say about guy with big shoes! Big Feet!" - Jenny

"You know what they say about girls who put a whole shot of kahlua in one cup of milk! Alcoholic!" - Natalie

"Life is too short to be an oompaloompa!" - Lisa

"After awhile, the flamingo starts to dance with these!" - Matt

"You did co-current flow? Who models co-current flow anymore. That's so kindergarten!" - Kevin

"I think we will have to test it and as with all good experiments it will take many many trials
oh of course! tons! and if you want it done right you have to do it yourself
its gonna be hard work but I think I'm up to the challenge
yeah, it'll be lots of long hours...tons of work...but for the good of the scientific knowledge of our country, we're obligated to do it
we're just being patriotic! it's kind of like saving bottle caps during WW2! :-)
ExACTLY" - Jenny and Kyle discussing how they can assist their country...if you want to know what we were talking about, you'll have to ask nicely <evil grin>

"Watch out Matt, I'm coming down! Wait, that sounded bad." - Jenny

"I always play the drums naked." - Natalie

"That thing is a lot bigger than it looks!" - General consensus

"Kyle, when I say 'ugh' tomorrow morning when the alarm goes off, it means 'Thanks for having us and we had a really good time." - Natalie

"When I say ARGH after you step on me as you get out of bed, same goes for me." - Matty
"On a scale of 1 to 10, is that a yes or a no?"

"That guy cut me off!" - Jenny

"Want me to moon him?" - Matt

"Speed limit enforced by aircraft" - Sign every 2 minutes in Virginia

"Does that mean fighter jets are going to start shooting at us if you speed?" - Natalie

"Wow, when we get shot down by those fighter jets now, flaming balls are going to shoot into the sky for over a minute!" - On the ride home carrying $100 worth of explosive fireworks through the fine state of Virginia

"Can someone explain this god fish thing to me?" - Natalie

"And what about those 3 god crosses in the fields?" - Natalie

"Hey asshole, howya doing?" - Natalie

"I'm telling you - next time, we are going to Hillbilly Golf!" - Matt

"Personally I'm looking forward to the gambling Indians." - Matt

"Goodbye Route 40, I rode you long and hard all weekend, but now it's time to say goodbye." - Jenny

"Seems to me, if you're a kid shrink and you're right 46% of the time, you're going to have kids committing suicide left and right!"

"Hi Jenny, it's Kiliaen! Where are you?" - Kiliaen on cell phone

"5 feet from you." - Jenny on cell phone

"Who would have known that Jesus would come back as a truck driver?!"  

"Here, cut off my genitals." - Matt

"You need to use what you have, my friend. You have breasts, you have a vagina. USE THEM!" - Natalie giving guy advice

"So being the chemistry God isn't all it's cracked up to be?" - Natalie to Dr. Munson

"We need a whole separate waste disposal system to take care of the garbage that comes out of Jenny's mouth!" - Matt

"Don't think about ruining your life in the long run, think about what fun you'd have right now!" - Natalie referring to something about "shitting or getting off the pot"

"You'd think it'd be white by now." - Matty - We'd explain, but if you were there and heard it, you know what we mean. If you weren't there, we don't want you to know what we were talking about. :)
"That's the most disturbing thing I've heard all night." - Ryan
"I forgot to tell you my story!" - Jenny
"You're pregnant?" - Matty
"I wish!" - Jenny
"Ok, now THAT is the most disturbing thing I've heard all night." - Ryan

"Slave Joe gives all of his turnips to his kids! Slave Joe's kids would die with no turnips! I love Slave Joe." - Natalie

"This is no bullshit version of history. Slave Joe has a heart. This is the true story of Slave Joe!" - Natalie